Childhood Nostalgia Stuffed Crust Pizza with Mac & Cheese, Fried Pickles and Ranch Drizzle

WOAH IT'S VEGAN PIZZA DAY MY FAVORITE HOLIDAY.

To celebrate, I literally ate nothing but vegan pizza today. No lie - after work, I went to Mellow Mushroom for lunch (one of the very few vegan friendly spots in Bowling Green) and ordered a small pizza with tempeh, Daiya, kalamata olives and mushrooms. Bomb! Thank you Mellow Mushroom for allowing me to eat vegan pizza ALL DAY.

AND THEN for dinner I prepared the following pit-zuh in celebration of this beautiful, meaningful holiday. If I may, I'd like for you to read this post with your eyes and also with your heart - to get our country back to its roots and to recognize the TRUE meaning of Vegan Pizza Day. It's not about buying the most expensive gift or decorating your house with the biggest light show on the block or throwing the biggest holiday party with A-list guests. It's about... well... GOD BLESS AMERICA.

This pizza is all about nostalgia. It ties together a few of my absolute favorite things from childhood (and let's be real - I can devour these dishes in no time as an adult as well) - macaroni and cheese, fried pickles, ranch, and STUFFED CRUST.

As we all know, by now, homemade pizza dough is a labor of love. I have nothing significant to add to Isa Chandra's dough recipe so I will let you find that on your own. Spoiler alert! - the thesis of dough recipes is usually this - dough making/stretching/mixing is an art. It's simple enough - mix some yeast and sugar and water with some flour, cover it in oil, let it rest, stretch it out, kneed it out, let it rest some more, kneed it some more. But it is all about the feeling. Any seasoned pro (i.e. someone who has made dough more than once) can tell you - it's about your technique.

While your dough is resting (as there is plenty of this involved - believe me), first prepare your fried pickles. The biggest challenge in making these is abstaining from eating each one as you pull them out of the fryer. For one, this will burn you. Also, you won't have any fried pickles left to top your pizza. How embarrassing!!!! 

For this you will need:

However many pickles you want to fry - I use the hamburger dill kind 

1 1/2 Cup all purpose flour

2 Tbl cornstarch

1 tsp black pepper

1 tsp egg replacer powder

1 tsp paprika

1 Cup almond milk (or your preferred non-dairy milk of choice)

Whisk together all the dry ingredients in a small bowl. Pour the almond milk in another small bowl.

Fill a heavy cast iron skillet or other high-heat pan with vegetable oil about halfway, or about 2 inches below the top of the pan. Heat the oil on medium-high heat and wait a bit.

To prepare the pickles, simply dip them in the milk, then the flour mixture and set aside. As a general frying rule of thumb, always toss in a small piece of batter as a test before frying your main dish. If the small bit begins frying immediately, then your oil is hot enough. If not, wait a little longer.

Fry your pickles in small batches of four or five to avoid them clumping together. Remove with a fork or other slotted utensil and place on a paper towel to dry. These can sit and relax until you are ready for your pizza. If, of course, you resist temptation. Again, let me emphasize that this is THE most difficult part of assembling the nostalgia pizza.

Oh look at that - you still have some resting time for your dough?????!! How shall we pass the time? Watch a few Friends episodes? Read a Billy Collins poem? Walk to your corner bar for a pint of the good stuff? Consider overpopulation? Or perhaps we could, oh I don't know, make some MAC N CHEESE.

Now the easy option here would be to purchase some store bought mac n cheese. This will work in a pinch, of course. When I am feeling lazy/hungover/crampy I indulge in Amy's gluten free mac n cheeze, which beats any store bought product I've personally encountered. The problem with using store bought mac and cheese with this pizza, though, is that you have little to no control over the amount of sauce, which will become crucial in the baking stage.

SO, put on your big girl panties because it doesn't take THAT much effort to prepare your own sauce. Plus it's VEGAN PIZZA DAY so like I said earlier, don't lose sight of the Reason for the Season.

Here's what you'll need:

macaroni elbows
4 Cups vegetable broth
2 Tbl lemon juice
1 Tbl Earth Balance
2 Tbl olive oil
1/2 Cup flour
1 tsp salt
1 tsp garlic powder
2 tsp black pepper
a couple pinches of dried thyme, crumbled in your fingers
1 tsp turmeric
1 1/2 -2 Cups nutritional yeast
1 Tbl yellow mustard

Prepare the mararoni according to the directions on the package if you're a dummy or if you're not a dummy prepare the macaroni according to how normal humans prepare pasta. There's no crucial time frame for this so you can cook your pasta while gathering sauce ingredients, or mixing a cooking cocktail or finding the perfect Pandora station to cook to. When it's done, drain and set aside.

In a medium saucepan, heat your veggie stock over medium heat until it comes to an easy boil. Add the lemon juice, olive oil and Earth Balance and reduce to medium-low heat. Gently stir in the flour, salt, garlic powder, pepper, thyme and turmeric and cook for a 2 minutes, stirring frequently. Now add the nutritional yeast about a half cup at a time, stirring constantly to incorporate.

At this point, the sauce may bubble up on you. Watch out! Cover your face! Wear safety goggles! Or some hip Ray Bans or something.

Either way, once your nooch is all in, reduce the sauce to low heat and stir in the mustard - the crown jewel of any American dish. Stir a few more minutes until your heart is satisfied and remove from heat.

Set aside 1 cup of the sauce. Stir the rest in with your macaroni elbows and marvel at the beauty of humanity. If your mac and cheese is a little saucy - don't panic. This will be helpful to you in the end due to the wizardly habits of ovens and their tendency to dry things out.

Now is it time to assemble the pizza??? Yes. It is that time now. First! Heat your oven mega hot. (I do mine at 500. 475 or 450 is also acceptable.)

Let's prepare the crust. Toss your dough and make it work for you (I suggest turning on some Ru Paul for this piece). To make a stuffed crust, it works exactly as you think it will - stretch it out a little past the pan to have a little excess for rolling over. Line the edges with mozzorella Daiya cheese and fold the excess dough over.

Now, take that one cup of cheese sauce and spread it evenly over your pizza. Next, pile on the mac and cheese. Top with fried pickles. Brush the crust with melted Earth Balance and stick that guy in the oven for 18-20 minutes, checking back occasionally via the oven light but NOT via opening the door and gazing at your creation like a dumbass letting all the heat out for 20 seconds.

While your pizza is baking, prepare the easy peasy ranch sauce. Vegan ranch is no secret, nor is it too difficult to assemble. Here's a recipe I found on about.com that seems to work well for me:

1 Cup veganaise
1/4 Cup soymilk
1 tsp garlic powder
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp onion powder
1/4 tsp black pepper
2 tsp parsley
1 tsp apple cider vinegar
1/4 tsp dried dill

Whisk all ingredients together and THE END. I like the store mine in a squirt bottle for easy garnishing. It keeps about a week or two if you're brave. #upthepunx

When your pizza is done, remove from the oven, let cool, drizzle with ranch and enjoy with a PBR to celebrate your adulthood and remember this magical holiday that only comes once a year.

Breakfast Pizza

I have been dreaming of making a breakfast pizza for FOREVER, and today I finally had the day off work to do it.

There are four basic elements (read: four different stages of prep work [read: four different rounds of dishes]) of this pizza: homemade pizza dough (obvi), sweet avocado sauce for the base, tofu scramble with peppers mushrooms carrots spinach, topped with maple tempeh bacon. Geeeeeee.

As always, I recommend Isa Chandra's pizza dough recipe, which is straightforward and thorough. Also, I've covered the basics of tofu scramble somewhere on here before, so we'll skip that tutorial.

The maple tempeh bacon, however, requires some forethought. Make this one day ahead. Here's what you'll need:

1/2 package of tempeh
1/2 C soy sauce
2 T apple cider vinegar
1/2 T brown sugar
1/2 tsp cumin
1/2 tsp coriander
1/2 tsp smoked paprika
1/2 tsp chile powder
2 tsp liquid smoke
1 T pure maple syrup

Slice the tempeh into thin strips, and place in a shallow dish big enough to lay each strip flat. In a small sauce pot, heat the soy sauce and apple cider over medium-low heat. Once heated, add the sugar and stir until completely dissolved. Add the remaining spices and stir on low heat for another 2 minutes, then remove from heat. Once cooled, stir in the liquid smoke and maple syrup.

Pour the marinade over the tempeh strips, making sure that each one is completely inundated. Cover with plastic wrap and chill (bro) in the fridge overnight.

Now it's PIZZZZZZA TIME. Let's talk about the sauce.

No literally, let's have a conversation about pizza sauce.

Well no one has called or texted or g-chatted me yet so I'll continue with my MONOlogue about this pizza sauce. Now would be a good time to mention that I have a "thing" for avocado, and this sauce is not for the faint of heart. It's a little sweet, but definitely avocado-y and therefore definitely earthy and... avocado-y. Get these stuffs:

1/2 an avocado
1/2 C raw, unsalted cashews
1/4 C water
1 T honey (or your preferred sweetener if you don't "believe in" honey)

In a food processor, pulse the cashews until crumbly, then slowly add the water until it's all creamy and what have you. Add the avocado and honey (or your preferred sweetener if you don't "believe in" honey), and puree until it's all smooth and what have you. Look down into that little food processor hole and see if the sauce is all "loosey goosey" or all "stiff and boring." If it's all "stiff and boring" and might not hack it as a pizza sauce, continue to process and slowly add more water, one tablespoon at a time. I confess I was not diligent in writing down all of these measurements. Just pretend you didn't hear that.

Wait! Before we get any further, go ahead and preheat your oven to FIVE THOUSAND -- I'm sorry -- FIVE HUNDRED degrees.

So! Prepare the crust, spread the sauce, and cover the pie with your tofu scramble. Top with the maple tempeh bacon strips and, when your oven has done its "thang" (read: preheated), throw that pie in for 20 minutes.

Serve with coffee and good poems!

Thanksgiving Pizza

Ok, fine. It’s no longer week of Thankscooking. But I just now got around to uploading the belle of the ball this year, due in part to all the prep work that went into this dish. That, with all the traveling, may have stalled the imminent arrival of THANKSGIVING MEGA PIZZA.

That’s right, ladies. I give you Thanksgiving mega pizza. Rather than post a full recipe, I’ll just let you figure this one out on your own if you’re man enough. It was truly delicious and I am still rationing myself leftovers daily. Here’s what we have going on in this Thanksgiving Mega Pizza:

pizza dough from scratch (Isa’s recipe, found here)
orange pomegranate cranberry sauce - recipe found here
garlicky kale - chopped kale tossed in olive oil and garlic
thinly sliced sweet potatoes
rosemary mushroom seitan - recipe found here
roasted brocooli

Oh, yes ma’am. Happy Thanksgiving to me.

Now let the Christmas cooking begin!

Glazed Carrot Pizza with Cauliflower Punk Sauce

I could count on one hand the things I love more than cooking for touring punk bands. Actually, while I'm at it, I might as well.

thumb: my family
index: marching bands
middle: Pho Hoa Binh lunch buffet
ring: talking to Ira Glass on the telephone

See, and I still have the pinky left over!

My friend Cody, who often books house shows in this beautiful, zero-venue town, decided that this last house show would be pizza party themed. Really, pizza and punk rock, is there a better combination? So I brought this little ditty to the show, which was devoured quickly, alongside Domino's.

As always, I made the dough using Isa's recipe, which I have referenced here and here. The real belle of the ball here is the cauliflower punk sauce, which is savory and earthy and perfect next to the glazed carrots.

First prepare your crust. Then, in a food processor, pulse

1 1/2 cup chopped cauliflower
1 T minced garlic

Once finely ground, slowly add

1/2 C almond milk
1 tsp salt
1 T nutritional yeast

Leave in the processor until you're ready to use. Meanwhile, gather the rest of your sauce ingredients:

1/2 C minced onion
2 T olive oil
1/2 tsp marjoram
1/2 tsp basil
1/2 tsp oregano
1 tomato, diced
1/4 C water

Heat the onion in the olive oil and cook until translucent. Then add the spices and tomato, and cook on low another 2 minutes. Finally, add the water and bring heat to medium. Cook for 5 minutes, stirring occasionally, then add the cauliflower mix from the food processor and reduce heat to simmer. Let simmer for 10 minutes.

Allow your sauce to cool before assembling your pizza. While it's chilling out, prepare your toppings:

1 C shredded carrots
1 T honey or agave, whatever you're into
1 C kale, or however your heart is feeling at the time. You might need more.

In a small pan over medium heat, saute the carrots in the honey/agave for about 5 minutes, then remove from heat. Meanwhile, chop your kale, and toss with a small amount of olive oil in a medium sized bowl - enough to coat all the kale with oil.

Once your toppings are prepared and your sauce is cooled, now's a good time to remember that you never preheated the oven. So go ahead and turn it up to 475 "or as hot as you dare," as Isa says, and go watch last week's episode of How I Met Your Mother.

Once your oven is ready and your pizza is assembled, pop that thing in for 20 minutes.

And go check out Child Bite, from Detroit. One of them is vegan! So... that a good reason for you to listen to their music, right?

Orange Glazed Tempeh Pizza with Roasted Red Peppers

As time goes on I am getting less intimidated by making pizza from scratch. A year ago, it was an endeavor that required a few days planning. But now they’re more like, I don’t know, I wouldn’t say a walk in the park, more like a critical essay on the ecological elements at play in an early Shakespearean comedy.

This pizza was a labor of love, but I threw it together in a few hours, on the occasion of phone banking with non-partisan statewide social justice grassroots organizationKentuckians for the Commonwealth, of which I am proud to be a member. 

Here’s what goes into this pie (i.e. - All the steps you’ll need to prepare, and probably in this order):

pizza dough
as mentioned below, check the links for Isa’a recipe

roasted red peppers
1 red bell pepper
1/2 tbl olive oil
sprinkle of sea salt

orange glazed tempeh
1/2 a package of tempeh
1/4 cup orange marmalade
1/4 tsp lemon juice
1/2 tbl balsamic vinegar
1 tbl coconut milk

basil cashew cream sauce
2/3 cup raw cashews
1/2 cup coconut milk
15 leaves of basil, chopped
1 cup chopped spinach
1 tbl minced garlic
1/4 tsp salt

toppings
handful of chopped mushrooms
1/2 a package of Daiya mozzarella shreds

Let’s start with the dough. I have, at times, indulged myself in undertaking Vegan Dad’s dough recipe to make a pizza. But I have found that Isa’s dough is a lot easier to digest (mentally I mean). If you don’t own Vegan With a Vengeance, I suggest getting right with the Lord and putting it on your Christmas list. It is a must.

The dough I use can be found in her book. Also, I’m sure it’s all over the internet by now, so look here or here or here for versions of it. She is a goddess.

First, prepare your dough.

Next, roast your red peppers. I used probably 1 full red bell pepper for this pizza. Cut them into slices, toss them in olive oil, sprinkle a little sea salt on top and roast them under the broiler for 5 minutes.

Next, start working on your tempeh. It’s best for the slices to soak for a bit before tossing them on your pizza, so you can do this while the peppers or roasting, or while the oven is preheating for the pizza. Mix all ingredients together in a large bowl. Cut tempeh into thin slices, then toss in your marmalade mixture. Let sit until you’re ready to top your pizza.

Once your peppers are done roasting, turn off the broiler and preheat your oven to 500. This crap needs to get hot. It’s time to prepare your sauce.

In a food processor, chop the raw cashews until fine, almost powdery. Add the basil, spinach, salt and garlic, and little bit of the coconut milk. Process until mixed. Add the rest of the coconut milk slowly, processing until the green in your sauce is rather uniform.

As soon as the oven is preheated, dress your pizza and stick her in. I’ve read countless blogs that preach about the necessity of a baking stone or what have you when baking a pizza, but listen - I am poor, so I used a cookie sheet. Ergo, my pizzas will always be rectangular. And they still taste fine.

So bake for — gosh this is the part where I forget how I made this and so I just make something up — 20 minutes? Enjoy with an amber ale!

Smoked Tofu Pizza with Cashew Spinach Sauce

Killer pizza.

I usually use Vegan Dad’s dough recipe, but this time I used Isa’s. Both are stellar.

The tofu here was marinated overnight in Frank’s redhot, liquid smoke, balsamic vinegar and soy milk.

The sauce is a purée of spinach, cashews, coconut milk, basil, salt/pepper.

Topped with Daiya, mushrooms and artichokes.