King Ranch Casserole. Punk Ranch Casserole? Seven Ranch Casserole?

At some point last year I stumbled upon a photo of a vegan King Ranch Casserole on Instagram. Thinking that this concoction must somehow involve (magically vegan?) Cool Ranch Doritos, faux chicken, ranch dressing, cheese, Texan elbow greese, I screen shot that shit and put it on my list of Things to Create Someday.

As it turns out, the King Ranch Casserole does not, sadly, involve Doritos (though there is ample space for that modification should one choose), nor does it involve everyone's favorite MSG-induced addiction, ranch dressing. I did some research on this beast and stumbled upon the following description of the King Ranch Casserole from Texas Monthly magazine, which clearly I could not improve upon myself:

As far as anyone can tell, the recipe does not hail from the real King Ranch; how many yard birds have you seen in photos of that majestic spread? More likely it's a Junior League attempt at chilaquiles or a Texas take on chicken a la king. And though it is a member in good standing of the condensed-soup canon, those bland, oddly comforting Gerber-invoking turkey tetrazzinis and tuna noodles simply cannot compete with the exotic King Ranch, whose lively Tex-Mex flavors - spicy chile powders, zesty roasted red peppers, earthy mushrooms - coalesce in one sublime, admittedly unattractive package. So lively are these flavors supposed to be, in fact, that I propose you ditch the cans (except for the wholly respectable Ro-Tel), and make this from-scratch verson... One bite of this "steaming mass of melted mush" (as this magazine once referred to the KRC) should put you right back in mom's kitchen - and not in your high chair.

Pretty classic. So let's veganize it!

Vegetables to chop
1 onion
1 red bell pepper
1 green bell pepper
2 handfuls of mushrooms
4 green chiles, roasted and peeled (with stems and seeds discarded)

Spices
5 cloves garlic, minced
1/2 tsp cayenne pepper
1/2 tsp chili powder
1 tsp salt
1 tsp black pepper

Other stuff
tortillas - depending on the size of your dish, probably about 18
1 can Ro-Tel (this is the tomatoes and chiles that your mother uses to make cheese bomb Ro-Tel dip)
3/4 Cup flour
3 Cups vegetable stock
1/2 Cup soy creamer
1 package cheddar style Daiya cheese
1 package mozzerlla style Daiya cheese
1/2 Cup Earth Balance

(This is the part where I say first thing's first - preheat your oven to 350)

So first off you'll want to start with a celebratory cheap Texan beer. But since you can't get lone star in Kentucky, just crack open a PBR as you heat the butter in a large pan over medium heat. Turn the heat down to medium low and saute for about 5-7 minutes. Then add the spices and stir until the onions are evenly coated. Now add the flour - just a handful at a time - and stir continually. Once the flour doesn't look like flour, whisk in the stock, just 1 cup at a time. Then add the creamer and Ro-Tel and give it a good stir to make sure everything is incorporated. Remove from heat and set aside.

Now here's where we build the casserole. Some recipes will have you hold onto a little bit of stock so as to soak the tortillas, but I skipped this step and my casserole still turned out fine. I suppose though, now in hindsight, that this may have been a brilliant idea.

Anyhow, grab a casserole dish grease the bottom on the pan with butter. Now line the bottom with tortillas - make sure they overlap one another. Next, pour about half of the pepper-mushroom-flour sauce over the tortillas. Sprinkle half the mozzerella to cover. Add a second layer of tortillas, then more sauce, then the reamaining mozz. Finish with a final layer or tortillas and THE WHOLE DANG PACKAGE of cheddar Daiya.

Let this thing cook for about 45min-1hr. Until it's casserole ready. You know what that means. All brown and bubbly on top. Let it sit roughly 10 minutes before serving because ouch.

This post dedicated to the ranch-style home I lived in this time last year. Big shoutout to ranch homes everywhere. 

Roasted Zucchini Pepper Pasta

There are times when I begin writing a blog post and I am overcome almost immediately with the notion that my time would be better spent recreating and re-eating the thing I am covering in said post. It takes tremendous willpower to continue sitting at my desk, writing about the nice-looking photo above and remembering how delightful it felt in my belly. Today is one of those days, so bear with me!

Yes, this pasta dish was incredible. AND nearly all local to boot. The summer is the most fabulous time for my mouth, on account of the abundance of produce in and around my life. Thanks as always to my local farmer's market (and my good friends) for making fresh vegetables available to my tummy. One beautiful thing about this sauce, which I think highlights one benefit of cooking with local produce, is that it is not heavily seasoned. The vegetables sort of speak for themselves in this one.

Here's what I used to make this sauce:

roughly 1 1/2 Cup chopped zucchini (or about 1 "normal size" zucchini - though mine was about the size of a small child)
1/2 Cup roasted red peppers
4 leaves fresh basil, chopped
1 tsp sea salt
1/2 an heirloom tomato - all yellowish and reddish, diced

(also you need pasta. obvi)

To begin, go ahead and boil your pasta water to prepare your elbows or whichever pasta you prefer, because the sauce doesn't take too long. I must say, this sauce goes disgustingly well with elbows.

Note: if you don't already "have" roasted red peppers, go ahead and do this first. I have a post on roasting red peppers here if you need some guidance. You obviously may used jarred roasted red peppers but they tend to be pretty pricey. It's quite silly. I roast some every so often and keep them in the fridge and pretend they are from Kroger's, which turns out to be a bad idea because they won't last as long.

Heat a dab of olive oil in a small skillet over medium-high heat. Toss in the zucchini and sauté for about 2 minutes, or until slightly browned. Remove from heat and let these cool. Throw them into a food processor, along with the roasted red peppers, chopped basil and salt, and process for about one minute.

Return the sauce to a small saucepan and add the diced tomatoes. Heat for about 5 minutes on low, stirring regularly.

HEY and I bet you thought there was going to be more here, didn't you? No. It is that simple. Other than to say of course, that I garnished mine with a dollop of Tofutti's Better Than Sour Cream, which contains no hydrogenated oils and is delicious to boot. Also a sprig of basil. YUM town.

Philly Cheesesteak Rollups

Sometimes you just want comfort food and you don't want to spend an hour making it. These cheesy, meaty, mushroom yrolls are super delicious, take 20 minutes and totally fill that "I'm slightly hungover and have been doing yard work all morning and all I need is something greasy and filling to pair with this hair-of-the-dog" craving. We all feel it. Don't lie.

Like, have you ever wanted to make taquitos, but needed something a little more... thick? And also you were out of tortillas? Me too, sister. Grab this stuff! It's easy! [Serves 2]

(Also might now be a good time to mention that these taste AWESOME)

7 or 8 slices of bread (it doesn't matter what kind... I used whole wheat?)

a little bit of olive oil for grilling

one package of Daiya mozzarella style cheese

half a pound of store-bought seitan, sliced

5 white mushrooms, diced

1/4 green bell pepper, minced

1 Tbl Braggs liquid aminos 

First, prepare the bread. Cut the crust off the slices (you can save these for croutons!) Using a rolling pin or a relatively flat glass, roll out the bread until they are as thin and flat as you can make them. Set these aside.

In a small pan, heat one tablespoon of olive oil on medium low heat. After about one minute, increase the heat to medium-high and toss in the peppers. Stir for about one minute, then add the mushrooms. Cook for about 2 more minutes, stirring frequently. Remove from heat and place in a bowl to cool.

Return that same pan to heat and add the Braggs liquid aminos. Swirl it around the pan a time or two and add the sliced seitan. Stir fry on medium-high heat for about 2 or 3 minutes. (This might be a good time to prepare the dipping sauce. See below for the recipe!)

Once the seitan is finished, remove from heat and set aside. Now it's time to assemble!

First, grab a big pan and heat some olive oil (enough to coat the pan) over medium heat. One by one, lay out the slices of flattened bread. Spread mozzarella cheese across the slice. Carefully pile the mushroom and pepper mix near the back of the bread. Lay two or three seitan slices across the mushrooms and peppers. Delicately roll the bread up, making sure all the good stuff stays in. This can be tricky, but remember - you are an artist.

Once you roll one up, place it fold-down on the heated pan. Grill for a couple minutes, then flip over and finish the other side. You'll know when they are finished if you've ever been to Taco Bell.

Here's the recipe for the sauce (www.thebomb.com)

1/3 Cup non-dairy sour cream

2 Tbl chili garlic sauce

1 Tbl hot sauce

garnish with black pepper

Hell yeah!

Mushroom Quinoa Stuffed Peppers

I love this dish for its simplicity in preparation and its complexity in taste. I try to buy peppers from my local farmer's market when they are in season, but when I can't these sweet mini peppers from Kroger's are SO clutch! They come in a bag for around $3 and are delicious.

First preheat your oven to 375, then prepare your filling:

1 Cup quinoa
2 Cups water
1 cube not chikn bouillon
1 Cup chopped mushrooms
1 Cup chopped kale
2 Tbl Braggs liquid aminos

In a medium saucepan, bring the quinoa and water to a boil, then reduce heat to medium-low and cover. Simmer for 10 minutes. Then, add the bouillon and simmer, covered, for another 5 minutes. Drain any excess and remove from heat.

Next heat the olive oil in a skillet over medium for 2 minutes. Add the Braggs, mushrooms and chopped kale and sauteé for about 2 minutes. Add the quinoa and cook for another 2 minutes. Remove from heat.

Take your peppers and slice off the tops. Remove any seeds and toss in 1 Tbl olive oil. Stuff with your quinoa mix. Replace the tops of the peppers once they are stuffed, place in a shallow casserole dish and bake for 30 minutes.

Yay! Easy peasy!

Broccoli Corncake Stacks with Red Pepper and Creamy Garlic Thai Sauce

Whew! This one was a doozy but I am so thankful we got it done.

Not sure if I've mentioned this (lol?) but I work two jobs. Most of my meals aim to be quick, easy and hangover-friendly. But I rarely get to host dinner parties so intentionally I made this dish work-intensive. I don't really get many opportunities to do that anymore so here we go!

I've been really into stacks lately - an easy way to make simple ingredients elegant. Here's what's in this one:

layer one - broccoli corncakes
layer two - kale and mushroom
layer three - seasoned quinoa
layer four - cashews and red pepper
layer five - creamy garlic thai sauce

The kale and mushroom are relatively self-explanatory, so today I'll just focus on the broccoli corncakes and the toppings.

The corncakes were naturally the first layer I worked on, because they required the most prep and cook time. Here's how I built them:

1 cup cornmeal
1/2 cup flour
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1 cup chopped broccoli
1/2 tsp black pepper
1/2 Tbl white sugar
1/4 Cup almond milk or soy milk
1 Tbl canola oil

Combine all dry ingredients, then mix with the soymilk and oil. Fry in a cast iron skillet with 1 Tbl heated olive oil, flipping once golden brown. Let sit on a paper towel to dry.

Once you have your other layers made, let's look at the creamy garlic thai sauce. Here are the ingredients:

2 tsp garlic powder
1/2 tsp thyme
1 Tbl red curry paste
2 tsp yellow curry powder
1 tsp black pepper
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 cup vegan sour cream (I use Tofutti sour cream because it's non-hydrogenated)
2 Tbl soy sauce
1 Tbl chili garlic sauce

Whisk together all ingredients.

The last layer I prepared in this dish was the cashews and red pepper, because it's more important that those are served hot. Here's what I used:

1 cup roasted, salted cashews
1/2 red bell pepper, diced
1/2 Tbl olive oil

Heat the olive oil on med-high in a skillet, then toss in the peppers once you can see the currents in the oils. Give the peppers two minutes to release their aromas, then toss in the cashews, and stir until the cashews are toasted.

See this post on layering and stacking and being all fancy pants.

Breakfast Pizza

I have been dreaming of making a breakfast pizza for FOREVER, and today I finally had the day off work to do it.

There are four basic elements (read: four different stages of prep work [read: four different rounds of dishes]) of this pizza: homemade pizza dough (obvi), sweet avocado sauce for the base, tofu scramble with peppers mushrooms carrots spinach, topped with maple tempeh bacon. Geeeeeee.

As always, I recommend Isa Chandra's pizza dough recipe, which is straightforward and thorough. Also, I've covered the basics of tofu scramble somewhere on here before, so we'll skip that tutorial.

The maple tempeh bacon, however, requires some forethought. Make this one day ahead. Here's what you'll need:

1/2 package of tempeh
1/2 C soy sauce
2 T apple cider vinegar
1/2 T brown sugar
1/2 tsp cumin
1/2 tsp coriander
1/2 tsp smoked paprika
1/2 tsp chile powder
2 tsp liquid smoke
1 T pure maple syrup

Slice the tempeh into thin strips, and place in a shallow dish big enough to lay each strip flat. In a small sauce pot, heat the soy sauce and apple cider over medium-low heat. Once heated, add the sugar and stir until completely dissolved. Add the remaining spices and stir on low heat for another 2 minutes, then remove from heat. Once cooled, stir in the liquid smoke and maple syrup.

Pour the marinade over the tempeh strips, making sure that each one is completely inundated. Cover with plastic wrap and chill (bro) in the fridge overnight.

Now it's PIZZZZZZA TIME. Let's talk about the sauce.

No literally, let's have a conversation about pizza sauce.

Well no one has called or texted or g-chatted me yet so I'll continue with my MONOlogue about this pizza sauce. Now would be a good time to mention that I have a "thing" for avocado, and this sauce is not for the faint of heart. It's a little sweet, but definitely avocado-y and therefore definitely earthy and... avocado-y. Get these stuffs:

1/2 an avocado
1/2 C raw, unsalted cashews
1/4 C water
1 T honey (or your preferred sweetener if you don't "believe in" honey)

In a food processor, pulse the cashews until crumbly, then slowly add the water until it's all creamy and what have you. Add the avocado and honey (or your preferred sweetener if you don't "believe in" honey), and puree until it's all smooth and what have you. Look down into that little food processor hole and see if the sauce is all "loosey goosey" or all "stiff and boring." If it's all "stiff and boring" and might not hack it as a pizza sauce, continue to process and slowly add more water, one tablespoon at a time. I confess I was not diligent in writing down all of these measurements. Just pretend you didn't hear that.

Wait! Before we get any further, go ahead and preheat your oven to FIVE THOUSAND -- I'm sorry -- FIVE HUNDRED degrees.

So! Prepare the crust, spread the sauce, and cover the pie with your tofu scramble. Top with the maple tempeh bacon strips and, when your oven has done its "thang" (read: preheated), throw that pie in for 20 minutes.

Serve with coffee and good poems!

Roasted Red Pepper and Carrot Soup

It’s fall. And red peppers were cheap at the farmer’s market this week. Ergo! Roasted red pepper and carrot soup. Goes well with the sweet potato cornbread shown below. If you’re into that sort of thing. And you are, right? 

First of all. Do yourself a favor and get these peppers local, if you can. They’re like, hella expensive at the store ($1.90 a pop at Krogers [pronounced Krod-jers]), and I got all 4 of these peppers at the Community Farmer’s Market for 2 bucks. Farmer’s market elitism my ear, right?

Other stuffs you’ll need:

4 red bell peppers (ok folks, we’ve been over this already)
2 large carrots, minced finely in your food processor.
half a small onion, chopped
2 cloves garlic, minced
3 cups almond milk
1 can whole tomatoes, peeled
1 tsp sea salt
1/2 tsp black pepper
1/2 tbl oregano

You’ll need your food processor plenty for this recipe, so don’t be lazy about cleaning dishes as you go. Seriously. Those carrots are lethal orange.

First, roast your bell peppers. Cut them in slices and toss them in olive oil. Sprinkle with a little sea salt and roast under your broiler for 5 minutes.

While those are cooling, heat some olive oil on medium in a large pot. Add the garlic and chopped onion and C.U.T. (see topless lasagna post below), about 3 minutes. Add the minced carrot and cook for 10 minutes.

While the carrots, onion and garlic are cooking, run your red peppers and tomatoes in a food processor until liquidy. Add this mixture, along with your milk and spices, to the pot. Cover and cook on low for 20 minutes.

The only other anecdotal note I have on this recipe is that it suits one well if preparing for a hangover. Sits in the tummy well. Remember: beer before liquor, makes a man sicker.

Orange Glazed Tempeh Pizza with Roasted Red Peppers

As time goes on I am getting less intimidated by making pizza from scratch. A year ago, it was an endeavor that required a few days planning. But now they’re more like, I don’t know, I wouldn’t say a walk in the park, more like a critical essay on the ecological elements at play in an early Shakespearean comedy.

This pizza was a labor of love, but I threw it together in a few hours, on the occasion of phone banking with non-partisan statewide social justice grassroots organizationKentuckians for the Commonwealth, of which I am proud to be a member. 

Here’s what goes into this pie (i.e. - All the steps you’ll need to prepare, and probably in this order):

pizza dough
as mentioned below, check the links for Isa’a recipe

roasted red peppers
1 red bell pepper
1/2 tbl olive oil
sprinkle of sea salt

orange glazed tempeh
1/2 a package of tempeh
1/4 cup orange marmalade
1/4 tsp lemon juice
1/2 tbl balsamic vinegar
1 tbl coconut milk

basil cashew cream sauce
2/3 cup raw cashews
1/2 cup coconut milk
15 leaves of basil, chopped
1 cup chopped spinach
1 tbl minced garlic
1/4 tsp salt

toppings
handful of chopped mushrooms
1/2 a package of Daiya mozzarella shreds

Let’s start with the dough. I have, at times, indulged myself in undertaking Vegan Dad’s dough recipe to make a pizza. But I have found that Isa’s dough is a lot easier to digest (mentally I mean). If you don’t own Vegan With a Vengeance, I suggest getting right with the Lord and putting it on your Christmas list. It is a must.

The dough I use can be found in her book. Also, I’m sure it’s all over the internet by now, so look here or here or here for versions of it. She is a goddess.

First, prepare your dough.

Next, roast your red peppers. I used probably 1 full red bell pepper for this pizza. Cut them into slices, toss them in olive oil, sprinkle a little sea salt on top and roast them under the broiler for 5 minutes.

Next, start working on your tempeh. It’s best for the slices to soak for a bit before tossing them on your pizza, so you can do this while the peppers or roasting, or while the oven is preheating for the pizza. Mix all ingredients together in a large bowl. Cut tempeh into thin slices, then toss in your marmalade mixture. Let sit until you’re ready to top your pizza.

Once your peppers are done roasting, turn off the broiler and preheat your oven to 500. This crap needs to get hot. It’s time to prepare your sauce.

In a food processor, chop the raw cashews until fine, almost powdery. Add the basil, spinach, salt and garlic, and little bit of the coconut milk. Process until mixed. Add the rest of the coconut milk slowly, processing until the green in your sauce is rather uniform.

As soon as the oven is preheated, dress your pizza and stick her in. I’ve read countless blogs that preach about the necessity of a baking stone or what have you when baking a pizza, but listen - I am poor, so I used a cookie sheet. Ergo, my pizzas will always be rectangular. And they still taste fine.

So bake for — gosh this is the part where I forget how I made this and so I just make something up — 20 minutes? Enjoy with an amber ale!

Basic Tofu Scramble

It’s amazing how much I love tofu scramble, considering how much I have always disliked scrambled eggs. It was the smell that got me. Ew.

I have prepared this dish so many times I could do it in my sleep. Start off with the onion garlic thing - sauté in a skillet (cast iron FTW) on medium-low heat until translucent. Crumble in well-pressed tofu with your fingers (serving shown here is 1/3 a package). Add a little bit of water to keep the tofu from sticking (continue to do this as needed until it’s done - which shouldn’t be very much). Stir a few minutes and add veggies - here I used snap peas and red peppers. Stir for 5 minutes, then add softer veggies like mushrooms and spinach. Grate in carrot just to be fancy. Add spice mixture - muy importante. I use an eyeball mix of cumin, paprika, sage, salt and pepper, turmeric, and nooch. Continue cooking another 5-10 minutes. Most important: follow your heart