Arrested Development Extravaganza!!

Oh guys. The time has come. This little lady has been waiting impatiently for FOUR YEARS (roughly the same amount of time it takes an "average" "college student" to finish a "bachelor's degree," apparently - which is a long time!) for new Arrested Development, and FINALLY the day has come. That cheeky little ballcapped Ron Howard, everyone's favorite ginger in Hollywood, has finally read my baker's dozen of threatening letters and has released Season Four of Arrested Development.

So what else is a hungry girl to do but THROW A PARTAY?! I am always looking for another excuse to feed people. This seemed like a no-brainer. I'll share with you the entire menu near the bottom of this post, but what I really want to discuss here today is my George Sr. SoCal Cornballs. These are easy, fast, and SO delicious. Omnivores devoured them and they fit the theme of the evening perfectly. So hunker down, find some frying oil, put on your favorite Jerky Boys record and let's get cornballing! No Rules, no boundaries, go ahead touch the cornballer you know best!

YO SOY LOCO POR LOS CORNBALLS!

Here's what you'll need:

1 1/2 Cups cornmeal
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 Cup flour
1 tsp salt
2 egg replacers
1 handful of pickled jalapenos
1/2 Cup canned corn
1/2 Cup Daiya cheddar style shreds
1/4 Cup almond milk

Start with your dry ingredients - whisk together well. Then add the remaining ingredients. If these come out a little dry, add a little milk to moisten them up. The important thing to keep in mind here is that you spend some time making these with the ones you love. These are good for premiere parties but they are even BETTER for a Saturday morning pre-bike-ride snack. Unless your son decides he has better things to do.

Wop wop.

The most important piece of this recipe is getting the frying down. Since The Cornballer hasn't yet reached Kentucky, here we must resort to tried-and-true methods of old fashioned frying in vegetable oil. Be careful though - it's still pretty damn hot if you touch the side.

Find yourself a small saucepan, and fill it about halfway up with vegetable oil. Turn on high and wait a few minutes. Here's where you need to do a test drop - pinch a teeny bit of cornabll mix and toss it in the oil. If it starts to fry, then your oil is ready. If not, then keep waiting. LISTEN guys - I am one impatient gal when it comes to fried treats like George Sr.'s SoCal Cornballs, but you MUST wait for the oil to be hot enough before tossing those suckers in. Once they're ready, turn your oil down to medium-high and throw them in a couple at a time.

Follow standard protocol for frying stuff (until golden brown), remove with a fork and let dry on a paper towel. 

I served these with a sweet mustard sauce, which was BOMB. Just whisk together some brown deli mustard, veganaise, maple syrup and a peeeench of brown sugar and voila! Delicious. 

And for the rest of the menu....

Vodka and Toast

"Get me a vodka rocks"

"Mom, it's breakfast."

"And toast."

Bangers and Mash

"Who'd like a banger in the mouth? Oh, right, I forgot, here in the states, you call it a *sausage* in the mouth."
"We just call it a sausage."

Skip's Scramble

Too many choices? Menu too big to swallow? Let Skip serve you up a scram that has something from every dish on the menu. It will knock you into next week! $47.95 a la carte.

Made this with kale hash browns, cheddar Daiya, smokey tempeh bacon,  and tofu scramble with mushrooms, peppers, spinach and carrots.

Frozen Bluth Bananas

These were frozen twice over and dipped in dark chocolate, rolled in almonds and cashews.

10 cents gets you nuts!

and finally...

Chick'n Fingers.. With Spicy Club Sauce

Also, not pictured:

boxed white zinfandel wine

ice cream sandwiches

Just a Reminder That We are Allowed to Eat Whatever We Want

Just because you are vegan doesn't mean you can't miss out on Cheesy Kale Hot Dog Sammich Time.

Just a reminder. And a poem (that's not really a poem at all but actually just an excerpt from "Pilgrim at Tinker Creek" by the beautiful Annie Dillard) to commemorate.

Thomas Merton wrote, "there is always temptation to diddle around in the contemplative life, making itsy-bitsy statues." There is always an enormous temptation in all of life to diddle around by making itsy-bitsy friends and meals and journeys for years on end. It is all so self-conscious, so apparently moral, to step aside from the gaps where the creeks and the winds pour down, saying, I never merited this grace, quite rightly, and then to sulk along the rest of your days on the edge of rage.

I won't have it. The world is wilder than that in all directions, more dangerous and bitter, more extravagant and bright. We are making hay when we should be making whoopee; we are raising tomatoes when we should be raising Cain, or Lazarus.

...served with sweet and spicy brown mustard. Duh :)

Shaken Vanilla Chai

The sun is out and it is high time for midday cocktails!

One of the many perks of the Starbucks barista life is the plethora of markouts we are given. Each partner is allotted one pound of whole bean coffee, one box of K-cups, one tin of Tazo tea or one box of chai concentrate every week! Amazing. So you know imma whip up some springtime cocktails with my partner benefit. This is sweet, a little spicy and perfectly caffeinated. 

This has been my go-to the past few weeks. Here's how you make it.

1/2 Cup chai tea concentrate

1/2 Cup vanilla soymilk

2 oz. rum

1 scoop ice

Shake all ingredients. Strain and serve chilled over one cube of ice. Garnish with cinnamon and Annie Dillard.