Mushroom Polenta: It's Ok To Be Sad

Two years ago I started this blog as a sort of forever-in-the-cloud recipe book for myself. I am always forgetting how to make things that I have made half a dozen times and I thought it would be nice to have a visual reference.

Eventually my blog shifted into a sort of Recipe Blog That Hopefully Other People Read. I've always felt I come at the vegan blogosphere from a rather contrarian angle -- I'm not, after all, an expo-going Lululemon model with extensive meal plans and Raw Till Four strategies in my arsenal. I'm not a fermenter. I'm not an efficient manager of time and I am not networked up with the folks at Beyond Meat or Daiya or any number of organic, sugar-free, nut-free, soy-free, gluten-free granola companies.

So what's the point, then? Where's my niche?

Aside from the fact that the real answer is It Doesn't Matter, my niche is feeling insecure. My forte is feeling scared and strong in the same heartbeat. I am a professional skeptic. I yearn for the chance to be honest about how None Of This Really Matters, and two seconds later to be excited about how No, Actually Everything Is Important.

Food is cool. I like to talk about it. Also I'm 26 and I'm not convinced anyone has ultimate answers about why blogging or vegetables or salary jobs or marriage can be Big and Important or not so important if you'd like. I have not graduated from college and I work at a coffee shop. I read books sometimes. I write in my journal. I sit in public places and stare out the window, wondering if I should say anything or nothing at all to anyone who may or may not be listening. And I guess today I've decided to try again to say things, even if they are just about food or privilege and just to myself.

Because it's ok to want things. Even if they are dumb things.

***

The other night my boyfriend and I were making polenta for dinner. We got the pre-cooked kind that comes in a TUBE in the extensive health food section of Kroger, which I have cooked with maybe thrice.

And, I don't know, sometimes you just have a hard week and one day you get anxious about Attending A Baseball Game and the next day you get depressed about how you didn't wake up early enough and the next day you get sad about how Everything Seems Terrible All Of The Time. One thing leads to another and somehow you end up crying over polenta.

It can happen to you.

And then you get sad and embarrassed about how you're crying over polenta. So you cry harder. And then you get even more sad and embarrassed because now you're crying harder. And eventually your loving partner will not find you ridiculous and irrational, but rather will hold you close and tell you it's ok.

Or maybe he or she won't. And maybe you don't have someone next to you be make you feel safe. All I'm saying is, eventually you'll find your way out of the cycle. But hopefully you won't even get to that point, because you'll have read Meredith's Polenta Tips and Tricks To Avoid An Emotional Catastrophe.

Brought to you by Chinua Achebe and Food Merchants Organic Polenta.

#1. The tube is a construct

Polenta is a traditional Italian starch that can take the place of pasta, rice or potatoes. It's super versatile, but also takes a while to cook. If you've ever made polenta from scratch (slow-simmering for close to an hour), you know that your end-shape will be nothing like the tube shape from the store. Don't get hung up on the discs. Sure, these are cute and retaining the shape can be effective if you're looking for a stackable sauce vessel of sorts, but keep in mind that if you choose to pan-fry, you're essentially cooking a corn-patty. It may not hold up. That's okay.

#2. Consider baking

Things Fall Apart. Just remember that if you choose instead to brush the discs with olive oil and toss them under the broiler, this frees up your evening a little bit. Now there's time to wash dishes or listen to Mike and Tom Eat Snacks or go get a grape soda. Instead of hovering over a hot pan, thinking about all the things you'd already screwed up and all the projects you've already abdicated today.

#3. Use a non-stick

If you choose to pan-fry, for the love of god use a non-stick pan. This is a must. This is where there Rapidly Escalating Fears of Adulthood are most swiftly nipped in the bud.

#4. Remember, olive oil is expensive

Now that you're definitely using a non-stick pan, it follows that you don't need too much oil. A tablespoon will do. The polenta will retain a good amount of whatever you're frying in, and that shit can get too heavy too quick. 

***

If you're interested, considering that this was once a recipe blog and will likely continue to mostly be a recipe blog, here's how I made the mushroom sauce for this dish:

This chunky sauce is a fairly quick and extremely flexible side dish that goes will with polenta, as well as pasta or rice. Here's what I used:

2 Cups chopped white mushrooms

1/2 Cup onion, chopped

2 cloves garlic, minced

1/2 tsp thyme

2 T Braggs liquid aminos

1 can coconut milk

In a saucepan, sauté the onion in a little bit of oil over medium heat for about 3 minutes. Then add half of the mushrooms, as well as the garlic, thyme and Braggs. Cook for about 7 minutes, or until the mushrooms are soft. Add the coconut milk and stir to incorporate. Pour the mixture into a food processor and set aside.

Satue the other half of the mushrooms in a little bit of oil, and cook until soft. Meanwhile, process the sauce mixture until pureed. Once the mushrooms are done cooking, add the sauce mixture back to the mushrooms and simmer, stirring occasionally, until ready to serve.

***

Anyways, it feels nice to be writing again. Even if it doesn't matter. It's good to do uncomfortable things.

Savory Sweet Potato Corncakes with Maple Cream

Hello. My name is Meredith and I love Brunch.

Sweet potatoes have been done 800 ways (and I am a sucker for every damn one of them). But this also means that every dude on the internet, from Martha Stewart to that Guy who wears his sunglasses upside down, has a recipe for sweet potato latkes. Or something similar.

But they all contain egg. Which is not cool with me. So here's a little something for you eggless types. I like a good savory brunch, and these sweet potato corncakes pair well with a sweet cream or syrup. These are hard to screw up and are easily crafted with a hangover (or a mimosa in hand).

Here's what you'll need (serves 3-4):

2 sweet potatoes (some certain size, peeled and grated)
1 shallot, peeled chopped

2 T all-purpose flour
1 T cornstarch
1 tsp cayenne pepper
1 tsp thyme
1/2 tsp black pepper

1/4 C vegetable oil
2 T almond milk
1 T ground flax meal

olive oil for frying

In a large bowl, combine grated sweet potatoes with those chopped shallots. In a seperate, smaller bowl, whisk to combine your dry ingredients: the flour, cornstarch and spices. Add to the sweet potato mix. Use that same smaller bowl to whisk together your flax/oil/milk mixture, then add that to the large bowl.

Mix all ingredients until well combined. Your mixture should feel sort of sticky but able to be managebly spooned into cohesive lumps. This sentence made me LOL you guys.

Anyways, if things don't feel too right, you may add more flour if your mix is too wet, or more oil if it is too dry.

Heat a non-stick skillet with olive oil on medium-high. Be sure to not let the oil smoke, or else you're screwed and you need to start all over from the beginning (jk guyz). Spoon potato lumps onto the well-heated skillet 2 or 3 at a time. I always like to do the first one all on its lonesome, to test out the heat of the oil. Once that one is finished, you usually can know if your pan is either too hot or not hot enough.

Fry on one side for  2-3 minutes -but if you let yourself get *too* distracted mixing pre-brunch cocktails or checking Instagram, that's ok. Not all is lost. Flip those guys over, smush them flat, and fry another few minutes. Check the side to make sure it's a nice golden brown before setting on a paper towel to drain the oil/dry.

The maple cream I like to serve with these dudes is super easy (read: totally predictable). Just mix the following in a shallow bowl:

1/4 C vegan sour cream
1 T v. cream cheese
1 T pure maple syrup
1/2 tsp brown sugar

I like to drizzle this on top, but according to the Internet, it's more traditional to spoon some sort of sour cream on whatever sort of latkes you end up with.

Smoky Midnight Mac

I know the title of this entry may feel misleading, but this post will in no way involve any scandalous stories about strip clubs or biker bars. At least none that I have planned.

Y'all I gotta say that I LOVE mac 'n' cheese. Macncheese? Man and cheese. Mac n' cheese? Mac n cheese. There are too many terrible ways to spell that and none of them look right. Point is, I love mac n cheese. I used to make the blue box on the daily when I was living at home. I remember having to write an instructional how-to essay for Mrs. Horne in 7th grade, and I of course neglected this elementary assignment on the grounds that I had more important things to do, like jump on the trampoline or read Harry Potter. So the next day in homeroom I whipped out this excellent essay on how to make mac n cheese - FROM MEMORY. Prophetic?

Actually. Considering how often I throw together (hopefully accurate) recipes for my blog from memory, I'd say that particular memory is creepily prophetic.

God I love mac n cheese. Ok let's get started with this one, because it's lovely and simple and delicious, Here's what you'll need (serves 2):

a normal amount of pasta

2 veggie dogs, sliced lengthwise

1.5 Cup chopped kale

1 Tbl olive oil

1 Tbl smoked paprika

1 tsp chili powder

1 tsp black pepper

1 tsp sea salt

2 tsp turmeric

1/2 Cup nutritional yeast flakes

1 Cup soy creamer

1/2 Cup almond milk

Begin with preparing your pasta, because your sauce will be done by the time it's finished. 

In a small skillet, toss your sliced veggie dogs in olive oil in medium-high heat until a little crispy. Set aside.

In a sauce pot, heat the olive oil over medium for a half a minute, then toss in your kale. Saute on medium for about 2-3 minutes, or until totally wilted. Add the paprika, chili powder, salt and pepper, turmeric and nutritional yeast and stir until incorporated. Slowly add the creamer, then top off with some almond milk. Whisk until fully mixed. Chop your crispy veggie dogs and toss these into the mix. Toss with pasta and BOOM.

King Ranch Casserole. Punk Ranch Casserole? Seven Ranch Casserole?

At some point last year I stumbled upon a photo of a vegan King Ranch Casserole on Instagram. Thinking that this concoction must somehow involve (magically vegan?) Cool Ranch Doritos, faux chicken, ranch dressing, cheese, Texan elbow greese, I screen shot that shit and put it on my list of Things to Create Someday.

As it turns out, the King Ranch Casserole does not, sadly, involve Doritos (though there is ample space for that modification should one choose), nor does it involve everyone's favorite MSG-induced addiction, ranch dressing. I did some research on this beast and stumbled upon the following description of the King Ranch Casserole from Texas Monthly magazine, which clearly I could not improve upon myself:

As far as anyone can tell, the recipe does not hail from the real King Ranch; how many yard birds have you seen in photos of that majestic spread? More likely it's a Junior League attempt at chilaquiles or a Texas take on chicken a la king. And though it is a member in good standing of the condensed-soup canon, those bland, oddly comforting Gerber-invoking turkey tetrazzinis and tuna noodles simply cannot compete with the exotic King Ranch, whose lively Tex-Mex flavors - spicy chile powders, zesty roasted red peppers, earthy mushrooms - coalesce in one sublime, admittedly unattractive package. So lively are these flavors supposed to be, in fact, that I propose you ditch the cans (except for the wholly respectable Ro-Tel), and make this from-scratch verson... One bite of this "steaming mass of melted mush" (as this magazine once referred to the KRC) should put you right back in mom's kitchen - and not in your high chair.

Pretty classic. So let's veganize it!

Vegetables to chop
1 onion
1 red bell pepper
1 green bell pepper
2 handfuls of mushrooms
4 green chiles, roasted and peeled (with stems and seeds discarded)

Spices
5 cloves garlic, minced
1/2 tsp cayenne pepper
1/2 tsp chili powder
1 tsp salt
1 tsp black pepper

Other stuff
tortillas - depending on the size of your dish, probably about 18
1 can Ro-Tel (this is the tomatoes and chiles that your mother uses to make cheese bomb Ro-Tel dip)
3/4 Cup flour
3 Cups vegetable stock
1/2 Cup soy creamer
1 package cheddar style Daiya cheese
1 package mozzerlla style Daiya cheese
1/2 Cup Earth Balance

(This is the part where I say first thing's first - preheat your oven to 350)

So first off you'll want to start with a celebratory cheap Texan beer. But since you can't get lone star in Kentucky, just crack open a PBR as you heat the butter in a large pan over medium heat. Turn the heat down to medium low and saute for about 5-7 minutes. Then add the spices and stir until the onions are evenly coated. Now add the flour - just a handful at a time - and stir continually. Once the flour doesn't look like flour, whisk in the stock, just 1 cup at a time. Then add the creamer and Ro-Tel and give it a good stir to make sure everything is incorporated. Remove from heat and set aside.

Now here's where we build the casserole. Some recipes will have you hold onto a little bit of stock so as to soak the tortillas, but I skipped this step and my casserole still turned out fine. I suppose though, now in hindsight, that this may have been a brilliant idea.

Anyhow, grab a casserole dish grease the bottom on the pan with butter. Now line the bottom with tortillas - make sure they overlap one another. Next, pour about half of the pepper-mushroom-flour sauce over the tortillas. Sprinkle half the mozzerella to cover. Add a second layer of tortillas, then more sauce, then the reamaining mozz. Finish with a final layer or tortillas and THE WHOLE DANG PACKAGE of cheddar Daiya.

Let this thing cook for about 45min-1hr. Until it's casserole ready. You know what that means. All brown and bubbly on top. Let it sit roughly 10 minutes before serving because ouch.

This post dedicated to the ranch-style home I lived in this time last year. Big shoutout to ranch homes everywhere. 

Peanut Curry Tacos Because Taco Cleanse

Good evening and welcome to Blog Update After Two Gin And Tonics Night! Now that I've "achieved" "adulthood," just two cocktails can make for some pretty entertaining VEGAN MOFO so let's get this party started like we're 25 and we're up past our 10 pm bedtime!!

I have little to say about this dish, other than obviously it combines three of my favorite things - curried tofu, peanut butter and tacos. This is pretty simple and quick(assuming you don't regularly spend 20 minutes looking for spices like I do), and tasty to boot, so I'm pretty proud of this dinner. Perfect for the working mom!

#joke #neverhavingchildren

(headlamp edition because it's dumpster night)

Here's the stuff you'll need for these yumtown tacos (serves 2-3 because #singlelady and #leftovers):

1/2 small/medium onion, chopped
2 Tbl olive oil
1 tsp cayenne pepper
1/2 tsp paprika
1/2 tsp thyme
1 Tbl curry powder
1 tsp black pepper
1 tsp sea salt
1/2 tsp chili powder
1 tsp garlic powder
1 Tbl Texas Pete or other Louisiana style hot sauce of choice
1/2 a crown of broccoli, chopped
1/4 block extra firm, well-pressed tofu
2 Tbl nutritional yeast flakes
1/2 Cup chopped red cabbage
2 Tbl natural peanut butter
1/4 Cup coconut milk
also corn tortillas #duh
fresh cilantro

Get yourself a medium-sized cast iron skillet, and heat 2 Tbl olive oil in it over medium heat for about a minute. Toss in your onions and sauté for about 5 minutes. Toss in the cayenne pepper, paprika, thyme, curry powder, black pepper and salt, chili powder and garlic powder and mix thoroughly. Stir over medium heat for about 2-3 minutes. Add the hot sauce and stir to mix evenly.

Next, add your chopped broccoli and sauté for another 5 minutes. Toss in the tofu and make sure everything is evenly coated with spices.

Once evenly coated, add your nutritional yeast coat evenly. Toss in the red cabbage and stir another 3 minutes. Finally, stir in the peanut butter until it is homogeneously mixed throughout the veggies. Stir in the coconut milk and cook on medium heat another 5 minutes.

Remove from heat and let cool.While you're at it, heat the tortillas using a small skillet (no need for oil or butter here) over medium heat for about a minute at a time, then flip.

Spoon the mix onto freshly toasted tortillas, and top with fresh cilantro. Need I even say it? Best paired with a freshly cracked PBR.

(Side note: these are good for boosting morale after a highly unsuccessful dumpster dive. It sucks that you can't hit the jackpot every time.)

Egg Salad Egg Salad and VEGAN MOFO LIKE A CHAMP

My relationship with my younger brother is based largely on love and absurdity and obscure inside jokes from 20 years ago. Part of what keeps us in stitches when we're around each other is the uncomical nature of a lot of our jokes. He'll say something like, "Meredith, that man over there... is wearing a TIE!" and look at me with a pointed sense of doom. It sort of destroys me.

So one time he replied to a text message with just the words "egg salad."

"Tyler go home you're drunk."

"No Mere say it out loud egg salad."

Eeeeeeeeeegggggggg sa-lad.

It has stuck with me ever since, so today I give you lunch:

Truly, it's not a traditional egg salad, but it IS a salad with a QUOTE fried egg patty QUOTE on it. I posted the details about my new-found love of fried egg patties in a previous post about The Egg McMuffin, but as Vegan Mofo marches on valiantly into the abyss, I confess I have no apologies about recycling recent recipes. 

A quick refresher on the fried egg bit, for those of you who don't follow my every update on various forms of social media.... Here's what you'll need: 

extra firm tofu, well-pressed and drained, cut into thin slices

1/2 Cup soy creamer

1/2 Tbl turmeric

salt and pepper to taste

1/4 Cup nutritional yeast flakes

Whisk all these (but the tofu - obvi) together in a small bowl, then dip the tofu slices into the batter. Fry these over medium-high heat in a skillet for about 5 minutes, then flip and fry another 5.

Also included in Egg Salad Egg Salad:

romaine

chopped pistachios

avocado

agave mustard dressing

shelled edamame

Awwwwwwwww yeah.

Northwest Tacos and Doing Really Great at VEGAN MOFO

Doing really great at VEGAN MOFO guys!!!!!! Two posts in 5 days means I WIN.

No lie, I've been insanely busy with work and cooking and meal planning and this little thing called training for a marathon. I'm in the thick of it right now and some days I run for like, hours, and it's stupid. Really, don't ever run a marathon.

Tonight was Thursday which means hoards of drunk 20-somethings wandering in and around my home, street, square and alley and really all over the place. But we will pretend Thursday means taco time.

Quick note about Tex Mex: growing up in the American South, I became accustomed to what I knew as Mexican Food - white cheese enchiladas covered in a reddish brown sauce, white cheese dip, watery salsa and free chips, orange rice and pinto beans. Lime margaritas with salt on the rim. On your birthday it's all about the sombrero and lots of fanfare, free fried ice cream and a locally composed Spanish happy birthday sung by half a dozen servers.

It's my go-to hangover food. So of course you can imagine how appalled I was when, as a new resident of Portland, Oregon, I thought I was going to get Mexican food and was met with THIS:

"AUTHENTIC MEXICAN FOOD."

What is this???? Where is the cheese? What's with the fresh herbs? And all the colors?

Over time I opened up to the idea of "real" Mexican food, I guess, and at least it gave me some pretty pretentious fodder in foodie circles. "Yeah, aren't you so mad that Bowling Green doesn't have any authentic Mexican places? Even the ones across the tracks don't serve ceviche." 

I guess I miss it now. Because when taco night rolls around, all I want is crunchy veggies and fresh herbs. Here's what I whipped up for dinner. The red cabbage and sweet taters make it quintessentially PACNW.

Northwest Tacos

corn tortillas
avocado
1 Cup brown rice
1/2 Tbl taco seasoning
1 sweet potato
2 Tbl vegetable oil
salt and pepper to taste
1 Cup red cabbage
2 Tbl Braggs amino acid
1 Tbl brown sugar
1 Tbl chili garlic sauce
2 Tbl hot water
1 Cup cold water
a few sprigs of fresh cilantro
1/2 Cup vegan cream
1 tsp black pepper
2 Tbl almond milk
1 tsp dill

The first step is to chop and marinate your red cabbage. Of course, this is best done 1-2 hours before Taco Time, but you can fudge it with 45 minutes. That's how long it takes me to find and measure out and mix my taco seasoning anyway, let's be honest.

Slice the red cabbage into thin strips, sort of like the way you are thinking. There is no other way to "slice" red cabbage other than the way that is currently in your mind's eye.

In a medium sized bowl, whisk together your Braggs, brown sugar and chili garlic sauce. Add that hot water to melt the sugar, then stir in the remaining water. Toss in your cabbage, mix thoroughly and place in the fridge until you're ready to engage Taco Time.

The second step is to prepare your tortillas. For this dish, I created taco bowls using the back of a muffin tin, as seen on basically every life hack blog ever. This works well, provided you only want to make 3 taco bowls, as they tend to overlap and get wonky. No need to use cooking spray here, just fold your tortillas in the crevices, and bake at 400 for about 10-15 minutes, or until crispy golden brown.

Next, get your rice going. I always forget this step, which sucks because it ends up being a 15 minutes mistake. Good thing I am here to remind you!

Next, slice your sweet potatoes in thin strips, like thick french fries. Using a cast iron skillet, heat the vegetable oil over medium high heat. As always, it's good to use a test piece with this one. Break off a small piece of sweet potato and toss in the oil to test its heat. Once the piece starts to fry, toss the rest in. Fry until golden brown (about 5-7 minutes). Then lay them to dry on paper towels. Immediately salt and pepper to taste.

Once your taters are finished, discard your oil (I strain and save mine for later use) and dump the rice into that same cast iron. Add your taco seasoning* and stir fry for about 5-7 minutes.

While everything is finishing, crack open your second PBR and whisk together your sour cream topping. This piece is crucial for ultimate Portland-ness, provided you have access to a squirt bottle. These are like a buck and a half and will turn any amateur home cook into a veritable culinary Mick Jagger. People will literally be impressed with your cooking simply because of a $1.65 investment. It's my secret weapon.

Whisk together the sour cream, pepper, almond milk and dill. Toss that into your squirt bottle for maximum squiggly. 

Build it: taco shell, rice, cabbage, taters. Top with sliced avocado. Garnish with fresh cilantro. I served mine with cheesy refried beans and DUH a Pabst. Because.

*Soon I'll post my seasoning recipe. I DISlike purchasing seasoning packets from the store, because most of them are full of preservatives and MSG. For what its worth, the only vegan taco seasoning without MSG in Bowling Green is Ortega's seasoning.